It’s not the notion of being one. Rather, it’s how well the alpha-ness can be controlled.
I am naturally alpha. I’m learning quickly from my previous gigs and my newest one, however, that I must be able to control my alpha-ness regardless of how much alpha rests in my bones. (And there’s a lot.) This is not to say I need to diminish it. I just need to be careful not to let it spill all over the place like and make a mess of it, like knocking down an opened box of Cocoa Puffs from the counter onto the floor.
Learning to control my alpha means I’m leaving more space to observe and listen, thus learn. This is especially crucial because of the field in which I now work. It’s quite a steep learning curve, adjusting to this genre of work, that is. I have no choice but to observe and listen if I want to be respected and trusted. Similarly but on a more relational level, I’m leaving space to let my coworkers’ personalities shine. In this way, I am better able to communicate with them.
Debunking this alpha female.
- Being an alpha female doesn’t mean I’m alpha all the time. I enjoy my me time. I’m not always overtly social and outgoing.
- You guessed it. I’m not afraid of confrontation. BUT, that doesn’t mean you can attack me. There’s a difference between confronting and attacking.
- My alpha-ness portrays itself differently at home and at work.
There are times I wish being an alpha female wasn’t such a dominant trait. I’m dealing with it and learning more and more when and how to control it.
I wonder, was I born this way? Have I subconsciously learned to groom it? Maybe meeting my birth mother one day might give me some insight…